Stray Dog
by Izuro
Summary: He looked so helpless out there, shivering in the rain... I couldn't help but pick him up. ShounenAi [HavocFuery] [NOW COMPLETE!]
1. Caretaker

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA or any of the characters… Sadly, as I would love a Havoc and a Fuery.

Author's Notes: Japanese in this story is as follows:

Taisa: Colonel (Roy)

-shoui:2nd Lieutenant (Havoc)

-souchou: Sergeant Major (Fuery)

-chuui: 1st Lieutenant (Hawkeye)

-san: Mr./Mrs./Ms. (sign of formality)

Also, in my stories, Fuery is ALWAYS spelled Kain Fuery. Because I have official pictures which tell me to spell it that way. I will never spell it otherwise. :p That being said, enjoy!

Stray Dog

By Dejiko Mew Mew

_He looked so helpless out there, shivering in the rain... I couldn't help but pick him up._

I never asked him what had happened that night, what events caused him to be in the condition which I found him. I can still clearly recall the cigarette, struggling to stay lit in the rain, dangling carelessly from his lips. I remember his distant, soulless eyes and the depth of the sorrow that loomed within them.

"Havoc-shoui!" I had called as I ran towards him, my umbrella falling to the ground as I had instantly abandoned my grip on it. I quickly removed my coat and wrapped him in it. I placed my hand upon his forehead. "You're burning up! What are you doing sitting out here in this weather?"

And though our eyes met then, I felt invisible to his gaze. I wouldn't wait for an answer as I took his arm, placing it around the back of my neck, and lifted him upwards. I brought him home with me.

It was awkward, of course, at first. I had brought blankets for him to warm up in, and I made hot tea. Though my attempts at conversation never bore fruit, somehow I knew he was trying to convey his gratitude.

After that, it was as though time was standing still. Minutes turned into hours and Havoc-shoui's temperament had not changed. The worry was becoming increasingly painful. I sat down beside him.

At the very least, the color was returning to his paled face. I was unaware of how to ascertain any further information, however. It would be silly to ask him, as one could clearly see that he was upset about something. I would simply have to wait patiently, by his side, until he was ready, until he was well.

... That was three days ago. Havoc-shoui seems to have completely recovered, though he had shown little signs of it when he left my dorm that night.

It's... just strange, really. The feelings I've been having since then, I mean. For some unexplainable reason, I've found myself coming home and feeling empty. Last night, I closed the door behind me and fell to the ground, crying. I didn't know what made me feel so sad, but the tears kept falling. I... never got to sleep.

But it doesn't stop there. I found myself picking up on things I otherwise would never have noticed... Like the way that Havoc-shoui's smile becomes a bit pained whenever in the presence of the Taisa...

I skipped work today. It's not like me, but I haven't been myself since then. My body acted on its own and I soon found myself at that place, where I found Havoc-shoui that night. It looked quite different in the sunlight, a perhaps not-so-intimidating location. My eyes drifted then to the gate beside where he sat then, and next to the house beyond it. _Was Havoc-shoui visiting someone here?_ I wondered. It seemed to be quite a nice place.

And then, the owner emerged from the house. I stood wide-eyed as the familiar figure came to the gate. He narrowed his eyes at me and passed through, looking right down upon me as he spoke.

"Did you need something, Fuery-souchou?" Taisa asked suspiciously.

"N-No, of course not!" I bowed. "This... is your house, Taisa? It's nice..." Small talk... Hopefully he wouldn't get angry with me.

"Why are you not at work?" he questioned. I froze, completely forgetting I had ditched today.

"Uh... Well... That is..." I stammered. I was caught. I wanted to ask the same question back to him, but of course I couldn't. He was in a higher position than me, and besides... I was in the wrong. "My apologies, Sir... I'm on my way right now."

I didn't wait for another reply from him as I turned away and headed off. And yet, I stopped and faced him once more. My body was doing it again... Moving on its own. My mouth would follow next.

"Taisa... Sir..." I spoke up. "Was Havoc-shoui here... three nights ago?" I couldn't believe it. My mind was not functioning properly at all! What was I doing, asking such a thing?

But Taisa's expression didn't waver. He seemed to reflect on it for a moment.

"He was," he decided to answer. "What about it?"

I couldn't expect any further answers, nor should I have prodded for any in the first place. "Nothing at all, Sir," I smiled. "I'll return to work now." I bowed once more and left him in peace.

Work was the last place I had wanted to be. As of late, just looking at Havoc-shoui has made me dizzy... I get an uneasy feeling in my stomach and my heart beats uncontrollably.

I stepped into the military headquarters and bowed as low as possible. "Hello, everyone... I'm... sorry I'm late," I apologized.

"Fuery-souchou," Hawkeye answered almost instantaneously. I raised my head. "We thought you were sick... Havoc-shoui just left for your house to make sure you were all right."

"H-H-Havoc-shoui did...?" I replied nervously. It happened again. My face flushed and I felt very faint. I shook my head out. This was not the time to be... whatever it was I was then. "I'll go get him and let him know I'm all right," I bowed once more. "I'll be right back!"

On the way home, all I could think about was how happy I was that Havoc-shoui was so worried for me. Of course, I scolded myself. I shouldn't be thinking about such things. It was natural, since I had kind of looked out for him. It was, perhaps, his way of showing appreciation.

When I arrived, Havoc-shoui was outside sitting on the front porch. He looked up at me and his eyes widened in surprise.

"Fuery!" he marveled, rising to his feet. "You're... ah... Well, you seem all right." He laughed a bit then, his token cigarette lifting upwards with his smile.

"I'm sorry to have worried you..." I blushed... Yes, blushed. Why? I don't know.

"I guess... we should get back to work then..." Havoc-shoui suggested, scratching the side of his head. I frowned a bit and nodded. He noticed.

"Are you sure you're all right?" he questioned, placing a hand on my shoulder (which caused me to jump a bit). "You've been... different lately..."

"Is that a good or a bad thing?" I asked quickly—I shouldn't have. I cursed my body's recent rebellion against me yet again. Havoc-shoui was, of course, caught off-guard.

"N-Neither, really... Just an observation..." he shrugged. "Did you want to take the day off? I think you should rest..."

"I don't..." I started. I was able to catch myself this time before any more words came out.

"You don't... what...?"

It was hard... They wanted to come out. The words echoed in my mind over and over again, dying to be heard. I looked at Havoc-shoui with a bit of pain in my eyes... "I don't... want to be alone right now..."

To Be Continued!


	2. Don't Go

Stray Dog

Chapter Two: "Don't Go"

By Dejiko Mew Mew

_I don't know why... but I found myself clinging to him... and unable to let go._

"Fuery...?" Havoc-shoui questioned, nervousness echoing in his voice. Now what had I done? ... And why were tears streaming down my face? I looked into his eyes then and found my fingers clutching his jacket tightly.

"I-- I'm sorry," the part of me retaining any common sense managed to say. "Could you... _Would_ you... stay with me?"

This would be the end, I knew. The end of everything before anything had even started... Or so I thought.

My eyes widened as Shoui's hand ruffled my hair. He smiled wide and laughed.

"Can't be helped, right?" he assured me. "I totally owe you, and I _always_ pay back my debts," he added with a wink. Needless to say, I felt that dizzy feeling yet again.

And so, I let him inside and offered him some tea. He began to glare at me, which I had supposed to mean that he was _not_ a "tea person."

"Where's your bed?" he interrogated fiercely... I nearly fell to the ground in shock.

"Th-- The bed?" I squeaked out. I shook out my head and attempted to remain calm, though my face was as red as the flame in his cigarette.

I opened the door to my bedroom and pointed to the bed before us with a trembling finger. Before I knew it, I was thrown to the bed and the covers were pulled across my body.

"Where do you keep your tea... stuff...?" he asked next.

"I... In the cupboards..." I replied quietly. "... Why do you--"

"_You_ rest. I'll handle _everything_," he winked yet again with that wide, lovable smile.

I hid my face underneath the blanket and murmured a "thank you." At the time, it was the best that I could achieve. I was really... surprised at the progression of events.

I felt really... special then. I had been taking care of myself for so long... it was just a miracle to be watched over-- a blessing, really. I didn't care if it was only to "pay me back."

It was about a half-hour later that I began to worry. The dorm had fallen silent. Tea... should have been more than prepared. I began to wonder if Havoc-shoui had left. Maybe... Maybe he thought I had fallen asleep... I had been rather quiet. A wave of emptiness rushed through me yet again and the warmth I felt only moments ago was now very much extinguished. I probably... creeped him out or something... It was my fault. I shouldn't have asked him to stay in the first place...

My thoughts were disrupted and I let out a gasp as I heard noises yet again from the next room. Several, loud noises in fact, and they continued to become more frequent and increasingly louder. I was a bit... frightened, but I could only assume-- and pray-- that Havoc-shoui had returned.

It must have been another half-hour before there was a knock on my bedroom door. I cleared my throat and hid under the covers once more.

"C-Come in..." I announced. Havoc-shoui entered the room with a grin... and a tray of sorts. My body thrust forward as I sat up in my bed, my mouth gaping.

"Sh-Sh-Shoui!" I cried. "A-Are you all right?"

His clothes... and hair seemed a bit singed, and his skin reflected harm from burns and cuts. Some places were tended with band-aids. Havoc-shoui laughed nervously as he set the tray upon my bed, scratching the back of his head with his free hand.

"I'm fine," he bowed. "Just... had a little trouble... with the soup." He lifted the lid to the bowl that sat upon the tray. A slightly-burnt aroma rose from the slightly-blackened soup.

"I didn't... have any soup here..." I marveled.

"I noticed," Havoc smirked. "They say soup helps you get better, so I went out and bought some... Ah... Although... Mine will probably make you feel worse... I shouldn't have bothered! I'll understand if you don't want to eat it!"

"It's fine," I laughed. It was amusing-- and rare-- to catch Havoc in a worried state. I wondered if I looked so funny when I was worried... "I like things slightly-burnt," I told him and took a sip of the soup... Although... perhaps soup was not one of those things...

"You're a lot braver than I gave you credit for," Havoc nodded, rustling my hair once again.

"Ah...! Ahh..." was all I uttered. I forced down another sip of soup. After all... he had gone through such trouble to prepare it... just for...

_No good, no good...! _I told myself. People say I take things too seriously... I felt myself wanting to cry just then... because I was so happy. Maybe I was taking it so, but... it really was... that special for me. I was really happy.

But I couldn't let him know that. I was happy to be getting to know Havoc-shoui like this. I didn't want to scare him off in any way...

"Where did you get the band-aids?" I asked, keeping normal conversation open. "I... think I ran out of them..."

"Well... I knew I'd be cooking, so... I prepared." He boasted a pack of freshly-bought band-aids.

"You're weird," I laughed, placing a hand over my mouth in hopes of stifling it. I stopped. My eyes widened and I looked back at him with fear. "Ah...! I didn't mean...!"

"Relax," Havoc sighed, patting my shoulder. "Really, you worry too much."

"I... can't help it..." I replied softly. I don't know why I did, what need I felt to involve Havoc-shoui with my problems. "I'm so afraid... of doing something wrong... of..." I looked at him. I half-expected him to still be smiling, but he looked back at me with serious eyes and definite concern.

"Of...?" he asked... Did he really want to know? I swallowed hard.

"Of being left... alone..." I finished. My heart began pounding and I shut my eyes to fight the tears. They couldn't come now. I wouldn't let them. I had to show Havoc-shoui that I was strong-- that I wasn't the weak little baby of the group that everyone had to watch closely or I'd screw up. I had to show him that I wasn't only trouble-- I wasn't just an inconvenience...

But I couldn't... Because I am. I _am_ an inconvenience; I _am_ the baby; I _am_... weak.

I lowered my head and turned away from him, as the tears had begun to flow. _Damnit... Damnit!_ I thought then. I was so much more trouble than I was worth, and Havoc-shoui was bound to notice it now, if he hadn't already.

But he just placed a firm hand upon mine and looked directly through my eyes, staring into the very depths of my soul, and swore, "_I_ won't leave you alone... I _promise_."

To Be Continued Again!


	3. Misunderstanding

Stray Dog

Chapter Three - "Misunderstanding"

By Dejiko Mew Mew

_It was in that instant that a wave of calm passed over me, and I somehow knew this was something of what I was longing for._

"That smile..." Havoc laughed softly. He poked my nose with his finger. "Looks good on you."

_So... that was it_, I told myself. That strangeness I had been feeling was all really... me falling in love with Havoc-shoui. It was as though my heart had known it all along, but my head didn't want to believe it. And why should it? I'd only recently begun to acquaint myself with him, and yet, here I was, melting at his touch. I wished this joy would last forever, but I knew where I stood in Shoui's eyes. I was simply a comrade, at best, and the little guy that needed protecting. I was all right with that, if it was him. But even so, I wished for more...

"You're too nice to me," I blushed, lowering my gaze.

"Your tone implies that you think you don't deserve it..." he replied... I could still feel his gaze engraved upon me. I cringed a bit. What does one say to such a thing? I didn't trust myself to deny it with a straight face. I couldn't agree because it would just be more troublesome for Shoui... So I said nothing. I didn't expect to be released so easily, and indeed I shouldn't have let my guard down when I left his line of sight.

"Why... would you feel that way?" he questioned, his voice... a bit somber, perhaps. "I'm sorry... I shouldn't-- I just don't understand. You're... such a nice guy, Fuery. Someone like me... couldn't even compare..." His voiced faded and he grew distant yet again. I recognized the pallor on his face and I knew I had seen his eyes lose their splendor before. He didn't seem to have voiced a complete thought, and I wondered what sadness remained locked in his thoughts. I didn't know, and I couldn't possibly hope to understand, but I couldn't leave the one whom I adored in such pain.

"Those should be my lines," I smiled, scratching the back of my head. "I'm a useless idiot that only gets in everyone's way. I'm always... being protected... I mean, it's nice-- kinda-- knowing that people _do_ look out for me, but at the same time, I _know_ what an inconvenience I am... And I don't have... anything special about me."

Havoc-shoui didn't say anything after that, and I could only hope that perhaps he knew where I was coming from, that maybe he felt a little better on my account. I could only hope.

"Well..." he said after a long silence, "I should head off... Hawkeye's already probably firing off her guns at people trying to find out where I am."

"I-I'm... sorry..." I apologized.

"No worries," he assured me, ruffling my hair like he always does. "I can handle it. I'm a tough guy..." He smiled wider. "And so are you. You just don't realize it."

I watched him leave then. It was a bit painful, as I had been so happy to have him by my side, but that joy remained in my heart. I wanted to tell him how I felt, but I had only just discovered it myself. There was no way I should expect him to return my feelings.

I went to take another sip of soup, only to find a cigarette butt in it. I laughed a bit as I set it aside and supposed there were things that even Havoc-shoui was a little helpless with.

---

The next day, I was up an hour earlier than usual. I spent three times as long getting ready... I really felt kind of ridiculous, but at the same time, I couldn't help myself. Although... if Shoui knew, he'd probably laugh at me.

I arrived at work ten minutes early and was ready to take on any task. I had somewhat put the idea in my head that today would be a good day. Nevertheless, the first thing that occurred upon my arrival was my summoning to Taisa's office...Way to ruin my mood.

I knocked on the door steadily, taking in a deep breath of preparation for the scolding I knew which was to come. "Come in," he answered from within, and I entered, closing the door gently behind me. I walked forward to the desk and raised my hand to my forehead in a salutation.

"You called for me... Sir?" I replied, trying my best to keep my voice even, to disguise the undeniable fear that always came out when speaking with Taisa.

"Yes," he said casually, still signing papers, one hand holding up his lazy head. He never looked up at me. I was never worth eye contact to him. "Explain your absence yesterday."

So, apparently, he noticed when my presence was missing, but it meant nothing if I were there. "I have... no explanation, really," I bowed apologetically. "I will take any punishment..."

After that, I raised my head to find his fiery eyes locked on me. My heart skipped a beat and I struggled to keep a straight face. Why did he look so frightening? I stood still and silent as he rose from his desk and ventured around until he was right before me, overpowering me in confidence and height. I took a step back. Why wasn't he saying anything? Did he really enjoy scaring me so much?

"_Any_ punishment?" he repeated, a sick curiosity in his voice. I didn't want to respond. I didn't know what was in his head at the moment-- if he was in his right state of mind. He seemed different...

And then I felt his arms around me and I was pressed against his chest. His heart was beating rapidly, too. My eyes remained wide.

"Would you really consider it that?" he continued. He placed a hand under my chin and lifted my gaze to meet his. He narrowed his eyes. "Why are you shaking?"

I wanted to run away so badly. I shut my eyes tightly. _I hate this, I hate this!_ I thought. Why wouldn't I be shaking?

"If you're still nervous about Havoc..." he started. I gasped and looked back at him. How did he know? "It's all right. I told him I wasn't interested. Nothing happened between us."

_What... does he mean by that?_ I wondered. And then, it all began to fall together... _Everything._ Four days ago, when I found Havoc-shoui, he was outside of Taisa's house. That's when it happened. He confessed his love for Taisa and was turned down... And, then... Shoui's words yesterday... _"Someone like me... couldn't even compare..."_

But I didn't want to believe it. I couldn't believe it. There was... absolutely no _way_ that Taisa could... love... _me_...?

A small gasp escaped my breath as Taisa's lips enclosed on mine. My body was rendered useless as I stood in shock. I couldn't even stand on my own; I was being completely supported by Taisa. I couldn't stop him. I couldn't push away. I couldn't... do anything.

And just as a tear began to roll down my cheek, I heard the door open. Taisa's lips quickly left mine and we both faced the unexpected intruder...

Why...? Why did it turn out like this...?

TO BE CONTINUED!


	4. Trapped

Stray Dog

Chapter Four - "Trapped"

By Dejiko Mew Mew

_I felt dizzy... so dizzy, in fact, that had Taisa not held me so tightly, I would have surely fallen to my knees._

The air was thin... I could hardly breathe. I wanted to run away, but Havoc-shoui stood in the doorway, and Taisa wouldn't release his grip on me. I wanted to push him away, but even if I had had the physical strength to do so, I could _never_...

I didn't know what to do, what to say, and the look on Shoui's face just... tore into my soul. This must have looked like the worst form of betrayal, and I wondered for a moment if I could set things right.

"Shoui," Taisa said then, rather commandingly. (It was directed at Havoc-shoui, and yet _I_ was the one who cringed.) Taisa is still the only person I've ever met who could give such a fiery radiance and yet still remain so cold... "I didn't hear you knock."

"I... didn't, Sir," he replied rather timidly... His eyes... They were the same as that day... _Please, _I thought. _I'll do anything, so, please... just don't make that face... _But those words would never reach Shoui.

"You are excused then," Taisa assured him.

"I'm sorry for the intrusion," Havoc-shoui murmured as he bowed his head a bit and disappeared. _No, _I thought then. _Please don't go! Don't close that door! Don't... leave me here alone... _Of course, stern hands held me tight and reminded me quickly that I _wasn't_ alone... He leaned towards me once more.

"T-Taisa!" I cried out, somehow.

"He won't tell," he smirked coolly at me. I whimpered a bit as he pressed on and wished he would stop assuming the root of my worries. I could feel his hot breath upon me once more and I was powerless to escape.

And then, suddenly, there was a knock on the door. Taisa paused just as his lips had grazed mine. He remained silent, as did I, waiting in anticipation. _Havoc...shoui...?_ I wondered, and I'm sure Taisa had presumed the same. The knock repeated.

"Taisa! Are you in here?" a firm yet discernibly feminine voice called... Hawkeye-chuui. I sighed with relief.

"I'm a bit... busy at the moment," Taisa responded, freezing my blood. How could he?

"Sir, this is _urgent_," she insisted. I felt a certain freedom as Taisa released me, bringing his arms to fold into one another as he sighed with frustration. He returned to his seat and assumed his usual position.

"Come in," he announced. She stepped inside and looked at me questionably.

"Fuery-san?"

I realized that it was rather strange-- my presence there... I glanced at Taisa, who was pretending to be absorbed in work. He would be _no help_, I noted.

"Ahh, that should do it!" I nodded, wiping my forehead with the back of my sleeve. "Taisa! Was that the only light bulb giving you problems?" I... thought a bit late that it was a bad idea to involve Taisa in my lie, and could only hope that he'd play along.

"Was that some sort of cute metaphor?" he grinned maliciously. "If so, then yes. Are there any... giving _you_ problems?"

I didn't know how to respond. I was in utter awe and shock of his seemingly innate talent for twisting my words, no matter how light the intent.

"I-If you'll excuse me then..." I bowed and turned to leave.

"Fuery-san," Hawkeye-chuui spoke again. I jumped a bit, not having expected a further retort; at least... not from her.

"Yes, Ma'am?"

"Havoc-shoui wanted me to tell you to meet him in the break room after your shift today," she said with slight indignation. She had never liked playing messenger... _Shoui_ _must have really begged her_, I pondered.

"Th... Thank you, Ma'am," I bowed once more. I hadn't noticed Taisa's eyes narrowing behind me...

---

((AN: This part is written in third-person))

2:45 PM 15 minutes prior to Fuery's shift end

Hawkeye entered the break room and looked instantly towards Havoc. She sighed. It was a mixed-emotion sigh. Half of it was repeated irritation-- she had been made the messenger again. The rest was a bit of sympathy-- of sadness for what the message contained.

"Havoc-shoui," she announced. He looked at her and frowned.

"Hawkeye..."

"I'm sorry... He's not coming... I don't know the circumstances, but he sends his apologies and wishes to reschedule," she explained.

Havoc sighed. "You can tell him... it's not necessary... It wasn't important anyway."

"Liar," she said cleanly. "Do you even realize how different you've been lately?"

Havoc's eyes drifted to hers. "Is it... _that_ bad?"

She smiled a bit. "Come on, I'll treat you to dinner. You look like you haven't had a good meal in days."

Havoc grinned lopsidedly. "Can I call this 'women's intuition?'"

"If you'd like," she smiled again.

---

Hoping that a few minutes was nothing to worry about, I hurried to the break room, where I knew Shoui would be waiting. My heart was pounding, and, admittedly, I was scared. I knew he'd be angry with me...

However, I entered the room only to find it empty--

Or so I thought.

The door shut swiftly and I clearly heard the lock catch. I didn't like this...

I turned around to see Taisa grinning at me, a hand upon the lock as if he wanted me to physically _see_ what he had done.

"Ta... Taisa..." I choked out, stepping slowly backwards.

"I changed your plans a bit," he smiled. "I hope you don't mind..."

To Be Continued


	5. Climax

Stray Dog

Chapter Five – "Climax"

By Dejiko Mew Mew

_How pathetic must I have looked then? My back against the wall and my knees shaking… My eyes constantly fluttering in a futile attempt to hold back my tears…_

Taisa approached me so smoothly—so fearlessly. But then, what _could_ he fear? Everything was succumbing to his will, and it seemed I was the next victim.

His hand reached out and touched my face, and that was all it took to extract a tear from my eye. My eyes followed his steps unblinkingly and waited for him to make his move… I could do nothing else.

Taisa narrowed his eyes at me… I cringed a bit, afraid of his thoughts and his intentions. He suddenly slammed his other hand against the wall beside me, causing me to jump. The hand upon my face traced the pace of my tear downward until it reached my chin. From there, it held my position as Taisa leaned closer.

I shut my eyes and tried to turn away. _No! Stop! Don't… touch me!_ I wanted to say then… but I… couldn't… I shut my eyes tighter. Why was he doing this? Couldn't he feel me trembling? Couldn't he _see_ the fear in my eyes?

My entire body went numb as his lips locked onto mine, and a chill ran down my spine as he inserted his tongue. The sensation was maddening, and I began to feel very dizzy.

My gaze—though blurry—remained focused on the door. I kept somehow wishing that it would burst open, and Ha—I mean… _someone_… would save me…

That hope diminished more and more as Taisa threw off my jacket and began unbuttoning my shirt. When all were undone, he discarded my shirt as well, and started… roaming with his very warm hands. I cried as his mouth attached itself to my body and began to drain life from me.

---

((AN: This scene is third-person dialect.))

Hawkeye and Havoc sat at a nearby café. Hawkeye had taken another sip of her tea, but sighed as she gazed upon her company.

"You look very pale, Shoui," she frowned. "You really should have some tea. It'll calm your nerves."

"I can't help it, Chuui," he sighed heavily. A part of him couldn't believe he was having this conversation with her. "He must have realized my feelings for him, and got scared…"

"You're just overanalyzing," she assured him, taking another tiny sip. "It was just coincidence that Taisa needed him for something."

Havoc—who had finally gotten to taking a sip—now nearly choked on it. His eyes were wide as he looked back at her. "T… _Taisa_ needed him?"

"Y-Yes…" Hawkeye replied slowly, unsure of what Havoc was getting so worked up over. "He said that he needed Fuery for a bit after work today, and to let you know he was sorry, as Fuery's always one to apologize."

Havoc stood up immediately, his head hung low as his outstretched hands clutched the tablecloth.

"Is something the matter?" Hawkeye questioned quite innocently… She honestly hadn't realized what she had done, for she trusted the Colonel wholeheartedly. Knowing this, Havoc hadn't the heart to inform her that she had made a mistake, and he forced a smile onto his face as he looked back up at her.

"Nothing at all… I just… remembered somewhere I've got to be, myself," he smiled as best as he could. "Thank you for this… I really… _really_ appreciate it."

Hawkeye opened her mouth to reply, but Havoc dashed out the door before any words spilled out.

---

I cried out sharply as Taisa threw me upon the table and continued, his hands going lower. _Stop… Stop…!_ I was able to mouth the words now, but no sound could yet be produced.

I felt the button on my pants undo and I bit down hard on my lip. I hated myself… I hated myself so much at that moment for not being able to stand up for myself. I whimpered as the zipper went down…

Fortunately, it was enough to stall Taisa for a bit longer. He raised his head and moved his hands upwards to my face, wiping away my tears.

"Shh…" he soothed, or thought he soothed, as he brought his lips upon mine once again, stifling any other cries that I could possibly utter. I felt a hand leave my face and find its way lower once again.

I shut my eyes tighter still, tears still escaping. Taisa's hands had, by now, both returned to their previous task and grasped my pants… I thought it was all over then…

But suddenly, the door swung open, just as I had wished it. I was in such shock at the fact that I thought maybe I was imagining it, but surely enough, the hands stopped and Taisa and I both faced the man at the door… Havoc-shoui…

He stood there, hand still gripped on the doorknob, looking as though he wanted to rip it right out of its socket.

"I heard that you had some business with Fuery here, and I was just… _curious_ to know what it could be…" Havoc-shoui said sternly. I was so relieved to see him, and yet, a little embarrassed… I wished that I had something to hide behind.

I don't know how he did it, but Taisa managed to keep his cool exterior. "I was simply debriefing Fuery-souchou here," he smirked maliciously. I almost fell off the table…

"_Cute_," Havoc-shoui grumbled, releasing the doorknob and stepping forward. My heart raced, faster and faster with each step he took.

"How did you get in here?" Taisa asked next, perhaps trying to change the subject… Although, for the first time, I sensed a bit of apprehension in his voice…

"You should know," he replied, "that I'm the one in charge of the maintenance of the break room… It's only natural I should have a key to it." I saw his hand clench into a fist, and I started to worry…

"How unfortunate," Taisa smiled, a bit of a laugh under his breath. He walked past Havoc and stopped. Without looking at him, he said, "It's my loss, then, I suppose," and continued out the door.

It all happened so fast… I was… stunned… paralyzed. I absolutely… couldn't…

And Havoc wouldn't look at me… wouldn't say anything.

I wanted nothing more than to erase all memories of everything… _If I hadn't have gotten involved—I shouldn't have gotten involved…! _I thought such selfish things like that then…

But Havoc-shoui… He took off his jacket and tossed it to me.

"Are you…?" he started. He looked at me then, and just seeing that look—that look that breaks my heart and rips my soul—I couldn't bear it any longer and I screamed, holding my head within my hands and letting the tears fall as easily as they wished to fall.

And he wrapped his arms around me…

I was quieted in an instant, like a child when in their mother's embrace. I felt his warm, loving hand running through my hair and he said, "Shh…" But it was so different from when Taisa said it… He continued, "I'm sorry…"

"I-It was my fault…" I whispered with the little voice I had left… and then I felt him push away from me. I looked up to see those very serious eyes that always scared me a little, but were still full of care.

"_Don't_… say that… _Not_ now, not in _this_ situation…" he ordered. "_Understand_?" he reinforced harshly. My eyes were wide with awe as I nodded. With that, his seriousness melted into the soft expression I adored the most. "Good," he smiled a bit and hugged me once more. "I'm so sorry I didn't realize sooner…"

I smiled now through my tears and embraced him back, tightly. It didn't matter anymore, suddenly. I didn't care what I had gone through… I thought for sure that Havoc-shoui would hate me, and he doesn't. I couldn't have asked for anything more then.

"I'm s—" I started, but stopped myself… I was told not to apologize… but if I couldn't apologize… What was I to say? The silence was killing me…

I felt cold as Havoc's arms left me… I looked up at him, but his face was turned away from me. I could only half-see it, but it was that look again—that painful look. I lowered my head and noticed his hands were shaking, too.

"F-Fuery…" he said kind of quietly. He looked to be hurting, and I wanted to help him so badly…! But for now, I could only wait for him to say what he wanted to say… perhaps what he was hurting over…

"Y-Yes, Shoui?" I asked him, taking his trembling hands into my own, which weren't much steadier.

"I… I…" he stammered for a bit. "I've got… something to tell you… It's rotten timing I know, but… I've… I have to tell you, or I'll…!"

My slight smile grew more faint as I watched him stumble over words… I was sure then that he wanted to tell me everything… about his love for Taisa, and how it hurt to see me with him… I wasn't sure if I was ready for this confrontation.

Finally, Havoc-shoui shook his head out and looked me directly in the eye… No, through the eye, through to the very window of my soul. With determination, he took a deep breath and stated, "I… love you."

With those words, the ground beneath me crumbled, and I was left floating, weightless, on an infinite cloud of bliss. I couldn't believe it—I was so happy! Although… my face must not have shown it. I think I was too shocked at the words to bring the joy to my expression, and Havoc shied away.

"I-I'm sorry. I knew I shouldn't have—" he started, but I pulled him towards me and kissed him deeply. I don't know what came over me that I did something so bold, but I regretted nothing as we shared this moment.

"I love you, too," I whispered softly as our lips parted. He placed a hand on my cheek and stroked it gently as he smiled upon me… the warmest, most beautiful smile I'd ever seen anyone wear. It was in that smile that our future lay, and I would always remember it at any time to remove any doubts or worries from my mind.

Taisa apologized to me the next day… I couldn't quite tell how sincere it was— although I believe it was— but it didn't matter anyway. I was forever thankful to him for giving me this fated meeting with Havoc-shoui. Whatever the circumstances, I'm glad the past events led to the present that I have now.

THE END

Afterthoughts:

I'M SORRY! (ahem) For taking 9 months to update this… I want to thank Spades-san and all of my other readers. Honestly, the reviews I've gotten… I don't think I ever would have finished this without them. I hope this ending is to all of your likings. Thank you thank you thank you all so very much for your support!


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